Happy Merdeka

After 49 years of it, we pretty much got that down pat.

Now if only we’d work on Happy Bersama.

I love those moments. I love to wave at them as they pass by…

It’s been announced. I am leading the team. Time to wreck some havoc in our schedule to accomodate all the changes, and slowly take me out of the pattern. No more odd hours by mid-October.

I’m gonna have to use the transition period to streamline our task and process, in addition get the team focused on their key areas. Otherwise the additional work soon is going to sink us like an anchor. Time to transform the independent into the interdependent. We’ll need each other to survive.

If there’s a time for me to make a difference, now is the time. I’d be a moron to watch this chance pass by. Things are being done right this time, none of that shady stuff in the past. So I have no excuses.

I wonder how the rest feel about the changes.

“…with dress pulled up to show scary parts underneath…”

Japanese Paris Hilton Doll

This is about the most hilariously accurate doll ever.
Stole link from Kurt

OH Damn the Colours!

Should I worry about myself, or should I worry about the bigger picture? It’s not like I can repaint the bigger picture anyway, cause I don’t have that much paint.

So I guess I’ll worry about myself, and paint the little area within the reach of my little paint brush. Also I hope I don’t get painted over by the dark colours being splashed around me. Perhaps if there are enough little painters like me painting bright colours on the same canvas, the dark colours might be drowned out and I can once again frolick among the yellows and greens and reds.

I thought the new picture was just as bright, but it seems darker now. Damn you Neb for fixing my myopia. But I’ve made up my mind. If I get the right paint brush, I’ll paint in the new picture.

itchy shower hands

That’s what someone was looking for when they found my blog. Like wtf is that supposed to find?

Hmmm lemme try.

Looks like someone’s got skin problems o_O

Well that’s about as deep as this blog goes anyway. Maybe I’ll try some hot topics and see what hits I get. So here goes:

• Datuk K (Pak Besaq) and Siti Nurhaliza
• Airline bombing foiled
• Lebanon, Israel, war
• Pamela Anderson
• I cured cancer

I am an asshole, I know.

Like WTF

… is this?!?!1!!oneone!!

Urgh

Buying cheap merchandise, like a red Mao Zedong t-shirt from China costing RM8, makes you feel like you’ve struck a fantastic deal. Thinking about it more might even make you scoff at those poor suckers who pay RM 50 for a lousy t-shirt (that’s 625% compared to your price).

But all that good cheapskate feeling dissolves like the cheap red dye on the RM8 shirt, when you find out your entire load of clothes have been stained red.

Red-tinged beige-green is a sick, sick colour.

Somewhere else needs protection

During one of my inevitable visits to the office loo, I decided to take it on my own to survey the toilet habits of my fellow office mates (also due to lack of proper reading material in the stall).

Here are the results of my survey (based on audible clues):

• 2 out of 5 people do not wash their hands after doing the pee pee
• 2 out of 3 people who do wash their hands after doing the pee pee do not use soap
• 1 out of 5 people spend an usually long time in front of the mirror after doing the pee pee
• 1 out of 1 person sighs in relief after laying the log
• It is impossible to not wet the floor unless you don’t wash after the shizzle.
• Additional observation not part of this survey but of worthy mention: Some of my officemates can actually hold entire phone conversations in the toilet

Note: This survey was conducted in the male toilet. Approval still pending for surveys in the female toilet.

Conclusion: I now view my office like Monk does. Door knobs, keyboards, handshakes. I recommend using protection of the latex kind. Gloves. Finger condoms. Yes. Really. I’ll be the one laughing at you when you contract STD from a door knob.

Dreams

I dreamt of conquest

I dreamt of riches

I dreamt of dreams

I dreamt the sensual

I dreamt the ridiculous

I dreamt the subversive

But for fuck’s sake I can’t remember what I dreamt.